My brides often tell me, “My fiancé hates photos,” but can I be honest? All of my grooms ROCK their photos! Sometimes they even surprise themselves. Do you know what I most often hear at the end of a couples session?
“That wasn’t so bad at all – that was actually a lot of fun!”
Even better? Often it’s the guys who say this!
In case you are still a little unsure, here are 4 easy tips to help prepare your fiancé to be comfortable in front of the camera!
Help prepare your fiancé: let him know what to expect
Leading up to the session, explain to your fiancé what’s going to happen at your engagement session. Remember, he’s not spending his evenings browsing Pinterest for “cute engagement pictures inspiration.” He probably doesn’t know what to expect, and may not even understand why you are doing an engagement session. He already proposed, right? Isn’t that all he needed to do?
Explain the importance of these pictures to him. Let him know, “I know this feels stressful and you don’t want to do it, but I want tomorrow to be all about us. These are important to me because they capture starting our life together.” This way he doesn’t think it’s just something that is on his checklist that he has to do before the wedding, but that they are important to you. He loves you; he’ll do it for you.
In addition, explain what he should expect (and share this post with him)! Tell him Veronica and Rob are going to meet you at a place you both love (hint: see point 2) and spend an hour hanging out together. Rob always comes with me to engagement sessions to help your guy feel more comfortable and relaxed. Help prepare your fiancé by letting him know that he can’t mess this up, and you’re going to spend the time holding hands, cuddling, hugging, and kissing if you’re both comfortable with it.
Most importantly: Tell him you feel a little awkward about having engagement pictures done too. Let him know just how much this means to you and how excited you are to do it together.
Let him help pick your outfits and location
Help prepare your fiancé for your engagement session by helping make decisions about the day. By helping him to feel a part of the process from the beginning, he will feel more invested and relaxed when the day comes.
I have a whole post on what to wear for your engagement session here. Share this post with him, too! Personally, I find it easier for Rob to choose the shirt he wants to wear and then plan my outfit around his. (Sometimes we all need an excuse to go shopping, am I right?)
Incorporate his ideas into the session. Ask him if he has any ideas for your engagement pictures. By helping him feel involved, he will be more excited and realize it’s about the two of you as a couple, not “just about the girl.”
Think about what makes you two unique as a couple and incorporate those ideas into the session, whether it be the location, props, clothing, etc.
A little bribery never hurts
Make your engagement session worth his while. Let date night after your session be something he enjoys! Does he have a favorite restaurant or sports bar he likes going to? Maybe a movie he has been dying to see? Make that the date night stop after your photos! It will give him something to be excited about and look forward to!
Additionally, be extra loving with him beforehand. Give him a little extra grace, being even more loving and patient in the days leading up to your session. Picture day is super stressful, so it’s easy to get into a fight beforehand. Don’t allow room for tension. This means you’ll be able to relax and show true affection your engagement pictures.
Above all, be encouraging
Don’t remind him that he hates photos! I mean it – DON’T make a big deal out of it! The more pressure you put on these photos, the more uncomfortable he may feel! Keep it light, fun, and enjoyable for him!